Mathematics and Physics were never a problem per se, it was the context in which they were presented to me,that was the problem. The context of competitive exams.
Yes, competitive exams ruin the joy of learning. As I mentioned in another thread, I had discovered ways to write my own programs where I would be able to check my solutions, save various formulas ... The calculators were transforming rapidly at the time (1994-1998). It was about this time that Texas Instruments purchased
DERIVE and turned it into their on board Computer Algebra System, prior to the TI-Nspire.
I have to admit that I am still not all that clear on what my identity is. I appreciate you appreciating me. Believe it or not, your interest in what I have had to say or write may have prevented others in my society from filling me with overwhelming self-doubt.