Thanks for the commentary, Raul. When I was amped to study math and computer science formally, I have to say that, I really did appreciate the grant from the government at the time. I mean, I appreciated finally being able to attend community college and then the state university.
The thing is, when it was all over, I realized that I did not want to work in any office, and that I would probably never have a job that suited me as well as being maintenance worker / janitor / groundskeeper for the park. I liked to work outside and usually away from other people. It's a real quandary. I still like to study books intensely and work through exercises, but the thought of reporting to an office seems to be a Kafkaesque nightmare.
I never wanted to apply knowledge for other men´s wealth, not even my own.
I think it is unfortunate that universities have become what they are today, and if I were born in the Middle Ages, I think I would have no choice but to join a monestary so as to have the opportunity to spend my life studying. Whether or not I believed in all the hocus pocus would be irrelevant.
This world sometimes forces us to be full of shiit for our daily bread.