And last but not the least you are a weirdo.
I finally get it. Thank you for clarifying this for me. Weirdo-Rejectionist-Miserablist ... a little more descriptive than "Depressive Realist". Your straight-forwardness is greatly appreciated.
My animal body is feeling so tormented, and the cold air utterly mocks me. I can no longer take my life too seriously. This nightmare existence is not worthy of being taken seriously. We should not try so hard.