{∅, {∅}, {∅, {∅}}} : Rage Against the Meat Grinder
General Category => Why Think? => Topic started by: raul on February 10, 2020, 06:45:28 am
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Herr Hentrich,
Thank you for your words. I don´t know what I would do if I had Russel´s egg in my hand. It would be a huge temptation to crush it.
Only those who are concerned with questions of the meaning of human existence ask themselves this kind of questions. What does this mean? It means that you, Holden, Silenus, Ibra, and anyone reading this blog are freaks.
You are right. At this moment nobody would be booking any cruises to China anytime soon were Vonnegut in the flesh. I would not suggest anyone to book flights to this country because he/she might get dengue, zika, chikungunya or influenza. On Friday the First Lady got dengue. Will she go to the overcrowded public hospitals? No, she won´t. The government is lying about the number of deaths caused by the dengue virus.
Drive safely.
You and others may find this scene from Lust for Life with Kirk Douglas and James Donald.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGG_QJjnRbA
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That scene made me slightly teary-eyed. See what a sentimental fool I can be.
I see all the Van Goghs suicided by society, but maybe there is just no fitting round pegs into square holes. Maybe our failure to fit in or find a place in this world is our greatest success. Lots of contradictions, paradoxes, and even nonsense.
From one moment to the next, our entire universe can transform. We are maybe dimly aware of the creepiness of our own bones and blood. When we die, our bodies rot and decompose. Maybe there is even an in between realm where we are alive but as good as dead, or someone we love deeply is in such a state, and thier body fermenting. I am ashamed when the odors of death repel me. Then I witness the vanity of existence, and I must think against myself; that is, I see how sensitive and maybe even how shallow this thing I call "love" is. It kind of shames me that I allow myself to be freaked out by Life.
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Hentrich,
I am glad that you can be a sentimental fool, as you say, because I am no longer sentimental or emotional. The will to live is very strong. That is the reason I am still around here. I find extremely scary that most find this horror called life wonderful.
As you say when we die our bodies rot and decompose. Here students in the School of Medicine, even fight one another to get a fresh dead body for their studies. I may end up as meat for their experiments. Life is horrendous.
On your birthday I can only suggest that you drive carefully and safely.
Stay well.
P.S. You and others may find this article interesting:
https://allthatsinteresting.com/skoptsy
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Actually, I'm not very sentimental either. Usually too "ready to explode in rage" to even sit through half a film.
I don't celebrate birth, but mourn it. One must accept wishes gracefully lest snap. People just want to say "this that the other thing" but few care to hear how you actually feel at the moment, which is indescribable. It is a ridiculous life, more pathetic than tragic.
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To,
Senor Raul,
“The feelings of our heart, the agitation of our passions, the vehemence of our affections, dissipate all [of reason’s] conclusions, and reduce the profound philosopher to a mere plebeian.” — David Hume, An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding.
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Yes, Holden, the futility of our animalistic drives are behind every philosophical proposition, whether through the resignation of a pessimism or an attempt to "transcend" by way of system-building or starry-eyed optimism. This alone should shatter the dualism of "body & mind."
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Holden,
Thank you for sharing Hume´s quote. At this moment the only quotes I can share are first from someone who said these words: “You want peace? Do not exist.”
The other is from a famous U.S. publisher. Many years ago I watched a film called The People vs. Larry Flynt. He is the publisher of a famous magazine called Hustler. He said the following words:
“Moses freed the Jews. Lincoln freed the slaves. I freed the neurotics.”
Stay alert.
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To Senor Raul,
“but most things people do are a total grind, marriage, birth, children, it’s something they HAVE to do because they have nothing else to do. There is no glory in it, no esteem, no fire, their lives are flat and the earth is full of them.”
Charles Bukowski
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Senor Raul,
https://youtu.be/NSb6FHzwGdY
In this clip,the deceased daughter is brought back to life for the mother.It is one of the saddest things I have seen.
Many antinatalists blame the parents and yet the mother in the clip is as much a victim as the daughter.
We are in a place where souls get eaten.
My right lung is acting up again and has been causing me pain.Lungs are really sensitive organs.Corona virus attacks the lungs too.I think the youngest of the Bronte sisters,the quiet one,died of a lung ailment too.
I keep remembering the day ,about 2 months ,back when I was puking out everything ,my pillow was drenched in my sputum.Time is passing by,killing me slowly,one second at a time.
There are three things that have saved me from the most henious sin of all-that of being a father- my almost preternatural introversion,the skewed gender ratio in the country and the fact that,I see the decay in the midst of the all the faux glamour.
I don't get along with anyone,women or men.I hardly get along with myself.
Time is passing by.Time is , willy-nilly,taking me along.
Take care and a happy valentine's day to you :)
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Holden,
Thank you again for your response. Also Happy Valentine´s Day to you. (Hahaha). Yesterday I saw street vendors selling flowers. I hope they sell their flowers so that a little money comes in to their pockets.
Thank you again for Bukowski´s quotes and the clip. Bukowski´s quote is worth reading many times. Indeed as Bukowski says their lives are flat and the earth is full of them. Once I told my sister that most have round heads only when they go to a soccer match.
I read about the clip in Spanish. It is really sad. It reminds me of a movie I saw many years ago about Harry Houdini, the famous illusionist, who wanted to get in touch with his deceased mother. He found out that these so-called séances were a fraud.
I can only suggest that you take care of yourself as much as you can. Some call this tragedy, ie., Coronavirus/Covid-19 the Chinese Chernobyl remembering what happened in the nuclear plant in Ukraine in 1986. Others say the Chinese government is unable to contain it and in time the virus will go pandemic.
Today very early in the morning I went to a clinic. I thought I had the symptons of dengue. The hospital was overcrowded. The doctor talked to me only for five minutes. The cause is that I am allergic to reppelents. I must take paracetamol and chlorphenamine. I read that chlorphenamine is linked to Alzheimer´s disease.I saw a lot of parents, children and specially the elderly suffering much pain.
As you say time is passing by, killing us every single second.
Stay safe.
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Senor Raul,
This is for you:
By Beckett-
My dear Pamela, I was worrying and it was a relief to get your letter to-day and to know you were out of hospital and well enough at least to smoke, drink and feel an aversion to work. [25.11.53]
In the mean time Mr.Gary seems to have disappeared.Last he made a video was about 3 months back.
He does not like to leave his house.In his old house he used to walk in the nearby woods and now I think he just hides.
Maybe he is busy thinking about physics.And the absurdity of life.In the old videos he looks strong but in the latest ones weak and frail.
His soul is tortured.He has suffered a lot and life has left it's marks on him.
Hope is okay.
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Tears flow down my cheeks, without any apparent reason, just like I continue to draw breath without any reason.
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the entire cosmos
for no reason whatsoever
all of mathematics for no reason
all language and all communication for naught
it's all in vain
maybe the more serious ought to rejoice
that all this trouble is for no reason
is the seriousness and urgency about our existential dilemma
conflated?
If there is no reason for our existence, why are we not shocked to find ourselves still alive? Maybe we do not have to try so hard. The void awaits us all, and none of us will be remembered for long, not Schopenhauer, not even the Upanishads ... I mean, our species will be a memory in the mind of no one, as though it had never existed.
we and all our concerns are unnecessary
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Holden,
Using your words about Mr.Gary our souls have been tortured since we left our mothers´wombs. We have been suffering a lot and life has left marks on us. We, humans, are the blood bank and vampires are in charge.
I am mentally and physically weak. Do I, in people´s opinion, deserve to be sent to the psychiatric hospital? Yes but I would not want to be there because it is only a warehouse.
Most want to be with people full of life; so they say. They want to be with someone smiling while his/her leg is being amputated. Long live life!
Take care wherever you go.
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Dear Senor Raul,
Deleuze writes a great deal about rhizomes.The conventional script says that I should get married,have kids,look for the next promotion,buy a car.But I like to read about Ahabs obsession with Moby Dick the whale,I like to do my own kind of maths.
The definition of the gort society-the society obsessed with channeling the sem-en stream into a vag-ina instead of allowing it to fall sterile to the ground.
While I agree with Deleuze that one should try to look for rhizomes instead of being a part of the conventional tree,where I disagree,vehemently, is his apparent optimism that rhizomes,might,in the long term overcome the tree.
In the Indian society,one of the first things they ask you is -how many kids have you got?
What if I were to answer the question with the description of the different types of equations I can comprehend.
Think about it-Schopenhauer was not expressly looking for dismal career as an academician nor was Van Gogh actively seeking failure as an artist,and yet these two things had to happen inexorably,there is no rhizome,no matter how complex or intricate,which could have turned Schopenhauer into a successful lecturer and Van gogh into a successful painter,failure,worldly failure,was writ large in their very DNA.
Who knows,maybe,the failure,which the common man so despises,might not be the real success.Maybe nothing succeeds like failure?One must have a stout heart like that of Schopenhauer to withstand failure after failure,humiliation after humiliation and yet who could say with certainly that Schopenhauer himself did not go to bed every night with death-wish on his lips?
Take care.
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Holden,
Thank you for your words. The conventional script says, as you say, that you should get married, have kids, look for the next promotion, buy a car, etc. What it forgets to say is that you are going to die and probably die a terrible death.
After reading your words I remembered a TV reporter this morning telling that in Mexico 7-year-old Fátima´s body was found. She was kidnapped, raped and murdered. Her body was found in a plastic bag. Each day 10 women are murdered in that country. Human life has no value in this human farm.
Nothing succeeds like failure. Success in this cage called Earth is idiotic. I am often mocked for having a completely unremarkable existence. A wasted life, they say. In their view I have achieved nothing. Hail nothing!
Stay safe.
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Senor Raul,
The Most Eligible Bachelor in All of Europe.
Senor Raul,
The way I see,Shopenhauer was,by all accounts,one of the most eligible bachelors in the whole of Germany in 1810s and 1820s.He was rich,good looking and highly intelligent. He could have married any woman he fancied and not just in Germany,but literally,in all of Europe. He had the wealth,the looks and he was highly articulate.
Almost as attractive as Lord Byron himself. And yet, he refused to be the German answer to Lord Byron.Instead,here was a man,who like the Indian prince some two thousand years back,turned his back on the social mores of his day and chose to woo the goddess of Truth with all his might and all the resources he could muster.His philosophy is unparalleled in the whole history of the human thought. What increases his integrity by a factor thousand for me is he LIVED his philosophy when he could have easily had one of the Prussian princesses.
Lets not forget our blond and blue-eyed Rutgers boy here who in the 1990s was more interested in reading Cioran while I am sure many an American beauty would have given an arm and a leg to woo him.
I see this great line of inspiring teachers-Siddharta,Schopenhauer and Herr Hauser.
Because you see, when they said no to women,they did not say no to a creature made of flesh & blood,to the very personification of the WILL TO LIVE.I salute these true heros.
And you have done the same in Paraguay.
They inspire me every single day.
Take care.
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Lets not forget our blond and blue-eyed Rutgers boy here who in the 1990s was more interested in reading Cioran while I am sure many an American beauty would have given an arm and a leg to woo him.
Woah! I was 33 years old when I was going to Rutgers, certainly no "Rutgers Boy."
Besides that, I'm skinny with rotten teeth and receding hair line. That was 20 years ago, but not much was that different then (just a few less rotten teeth). I certainly was no catch, Holden. I was not trying to find a wife, thankfully.
Not only that, but I have, repeatedly in my life, when drunk, pined over several women from various cultures, and - trust me, Schopenhauer was on point as far as recessive traits (blond hair, blue eyes) in males do not attract, and may even repel, women with genetic traits closer to that of the original prototype of our species, that is, brown eyes and black, or at least dark brown (or bronze) skin tone/pigmentation. Schopenhauer may have experienced this directly during his beloved trips to Italy, where he was sure to be enchanted by those brown eyed beauties with the long black hair.
I've been engrossed in math these pass few days, and I do not mind at all having been swayed by the likes of Cioran and Schopenhauer to embrace a life devoted to pondering upon what a great accident it has been to have been born. Going through exercises by hand, and comparing to results with computer algebra systems shows me that, while I am in awe of what can be done these days with symbolic algebra systems, there is an almost limitless potential for deeper elegance when working by hand. There are steps a computer algebra system would just not be programmable to take. There is a definite degree of creativity when working by hand. Still, it is fun for an old fuucker like me to check certain steps of my work with the CAS.
For taking the derivative using SymPy, I define f(u) and g(x), then diff(f(u(x)), x)
I usually then simplify, but the results can be manipulated much more elegantly by hand. I am not arguing against the use of computer algebra systems, but only insisting upon the Value as Art and Craft of performing "the calculus" by hand.
By the way, there is no sense entertaining ideas of being known after our deaths. It is good enough to learn not to want life, and to limit our attachments until we lose this life that deceptively appears to belong to us. I am experiencing teeth rotting and falling to pieces while eating hard cereal. There were times in my youth this would have horrified me. It repels young, silly girls. I embrace this aging and decaying process - as I embrace the skeleton and moving bowels. The fact that I find mathematics more stimulating than ever shows me that there may be a few hidden jokes in the unfolding of our personal dramas that may put the apparent "failure of our uneventful lives" in better perspective, that is, from the perspective of a dead man, where the vanity of existence is exposed.
It is impossible to be a failure in an experiment by nature. We are what we are. An experiment unfolds as it will. There is no failure unless there were demands for specific outcomes, in which case this is a problem of Willing for the Unattainable, not a problem with what actually exists.
Rotten teeth are a sign of low social status, and thin body structure is associated with weakness, and possibly even poverty or malnutrition. I have learned not to be vain. This was learned by experience as I witness the stench of this Thing-in-Itself. I don't take my own Animal Body too personally, since there is not really an "I" who could be said to "possess" or "own" this animal who eats, shiits, and will rot stinking in the earth.
I'm afraid I do not own this creature who read Schopenhauer, but I notice it likes to work through complicated mathematics exercises, working slowly like a turtle through delicate steps, pausing to sleep when necessary, when too dizzy to stand.
Even though Schopenhauer did not enjoy the "drudgery of arithmetic," it is on his counsel to enjoy our own higher mental faculties in the sacred privacy of our own minds, our own inner life, that I have been able to resurrect and sustain this continued interest in abstract concepts which have enchanted me since my teenage years ... It is a world no one in my family has ventured to join me. My nephew had interests, and he still has his own interests, but not for the kind of devotion and commitment that actual engagement with mathematics textbooks demands. It has been my Muse, along with just a few of the most poetic philosophers. I am not to be taken too seriously in this incarnation. I get the joke, that we are all vain creatures destined to have our hearts broken, our egos squashed, and our skulls crushed.
You know, the universities work at an unattainable pace - that is, they don't care. Fit it in the grid. Learning does not work that way.
Anyway, it turns out that this desire for deeper understanding, while it may even sustain my spirit throughout this lifetime, may also have been responsible for my ultimate "derangement," as Artaud had hinted.
I have been an honest student, Holden. I am this honest student, still - just another fellow-traveler ... in this journey within our skulls.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bWqchTciaP0
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Holden,
Thank you for your response. I hope you are taking care of yourself wherever you go. I read that in Kerala there are patients of COVID-19. They call it the Red Plague. Here dengue is really hitting hard.
In Brazil scientists found a mysterious virus with no known genes they can identify. They call it Yaravirus in honor of Iara, a siren in fresh water that attracted men to the deep rivers by chanting, according to the mythology of the Tupi-Guarani indigenous tribes. There are those who say that the annihilation of mankind will be carried out by viruses.
Schopenhauer could have married any woman he desired but he did not do that. He was a very remarkable man. He lived his philosophy. There is nothing more to add about Siddharta.
About the Rutgers boy, I am sure, any American beauty would have given him not only an arm and a leg but also her “treasure” too, so to speak. To say no to a woman takes a great deal of courage. Few can do that in the sex market these times specially. I was often told that if you do not use your “tool” life is pointless.
Pleasure and reproduction go together. It is a simple trick to fatten this human farm.
Stay safe.
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Thanks for the response Herr Hauser.Thats a great response,I was, I guess, fishing for something like that :)I was half-joking while using the moniker the Rutgers boy, I know it has been very hard for you every step of the way.
I think here in India, the entire romantic business is a market really, its complicated but I think the most important factor is the income of the would-be bridegrooms.I have to say the WWR has helped me a great deal in making sense of my society and the matrimonial market. It is so very easy to lose ones way. You and Schopenhauer have made things every easy for me to understand and I would have to be really,really dumb ,if I were to lose the sight of the true light even now.
To have read Schopenhauer ,to have found you and to have corresponded with you ,is the greatest thing to have happened to me because I may have easily lost the way without the two of you. I derive a great deal of spiritual strength from the two of you .You have helped me to make sense of the world and the books that I read. Its so easy to get fooled in this world.So easy to be duped by the things around us.By glitter,by women,by the mores,by religion.And yet you and Schopenhauer, you cut right through all this illusion and go straight for the jugular.
In the streets I see rich men and beautiful women and I am no longer dazzled and even if I am,very soon, I shake myself out of it.I am watching DW,the German English Channel, and they are playing something about a hate crime in Germany on the one hand and there was another story about the German premier allowing about a million non-Germans to get into Germany and its all so confusing...until one reads something by Schopenhauer and you.You light the candle in an otherwise dark world.
With respect and in all humbleness,I note the following statement by you:
thin body structure is associated with weakness-Herr Hauser
In this topsy-turvy world of ours, I am afraid,something strange might be taking place:
https://www.irbbarcelona.org/en/news/joan-guinovart-for-the-first-time-in-history-the-poor-are-fat-and-the-rich-are-thin-its-the
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1538867/Forget-class-wealth-the-North-South-divide-being-fat-or-thin-is-the-only-thing-that-matters.html
http://www-news.uchicago.edu/releases/02/020221.poorfatrichthin.shtml
Take care,my most learned of friends.
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Thanks Holden. I am glad I am able to write from the hip, so to speak. I had suspected early on that my secret obsession with mathematics was also a secret rebellion against otherwise just being a sitting duck for Nature to do with me as it pleased.
The world has made it clear to me what it thinks of me: "You aint shiit, Hentrich."
If I take them literally, then they pay me a complement. ;)
I see the paradox ... the times are changin', now the poor get fat, but the fever's gonna catch ya when the **** gets back ...
Claude - please do not take offense if responses are not instantaneous. We each have our different moods and interests. I do not take offfense when posts about math or computing go un-responded to. Sometimes it is necessary for each of us to converse with ourselves. That is what philosophy is, no? Conversing with oneself.
I do not demand you take an interest in anything I might be inclined to attempt to articulate here; but, also, I am often self-engrossed and drained by demands for attention by the outside world.
If a paragraph begins to lose coherency for me, my mind is often in a too fragile state to work through it. Maybe in time, I might be able to decipher what you were saying better.
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Senor Raul,
https://youtu.be/pmxGj0JO6GY
The kid wants to kill himself.The mum says this is what bullying does.Well,this is what breeding does.
Take care.
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Holden,
I read about this child and I wanted to link his image in the blog. In a way you read my mind. Unfortunately this child will suffer again, again and again. This world is not nice to people with all kinds of disabilities. They have to develop a very tough shell to survive both physically and psychologically. Here there were cases where secondary schools rejected children with disabilities. My late father once mocked my female cousin´s baby who was born with cleft lip. We have a saying in Spanish whose translation is ignorance is bold. He did not know that his condition could be cured with a special surgery.
Here when we talk about someone with disabilities, we say that that person is “especial”, or special. This is the way we dehumanize our fellow human beings.
Stay well.
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Senor Raul,
Thanks for your message. I think the baby with deformity you mentioned, is one of the millions,who are born with a physical or a mental flaw.Most of them are in poor families and their condition cannot be remedied easily.So,they are forced to carry the cross to their graves.Schopenhauer spent most of his time alone in his rooms.
He went out only for his walk,dinner and opera maybe.Even then, he suffered a great deal.Nietzsche also spent a great deal of time on his own.Apparently, he liked a woman a great deal and might even have wanted to marry her ,only she did not reciprocate his sentiments.
It is ironic that health-wise Schopenhauer was the robust one and yet it is he who writes about how abhorrent he finds life and living and Nietzsche, despite of being a convalescent, seems to glorify life.
I see no glory in dragging and feeding ones body.No glory whatsoever.Not now,not ever.
The Indian mind seems to me to be obsessed with feeding and breeding.In a word,with the flowering of the will to life and most people,heck,everyone seems to overlook the concomitant suffering altogether.
I see babies,barely two years old, playing in the dirt on the footpath.Playing with broken toys.They themselves,are broken toys for their parents.We are engaged in a nefarious struggle.Insidious struggle.
Take care.
https://youtu.be/R7xu4D7lJyU
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The Joker is a gorts idea of a what a radical rebel is.When I think of a true rebel,I think of Schopenhauer. Maybe the five men who did attend his first lecture in the University of Berlin were Herr Hauser,Senor Raul,Mr.Silenus,Mr.Ibra and Holden,in another life.
I think Schopenhauer would like that very much.I mean, he would prefer that five genuine students attend his lecture than hundreds of gorts.To remain unmarried for the whole of ones life and to devote ione t to the pursuit of the goddess of truth, while knowing full well,that she might never give herself to one,that he what is did. You see ,the thing with the pursuit of the truth is that one is never sure,if one is going to achieve ones objective. But the pursuit itself is worth it. To be another Schopenhauer,even if it should mean getting estranged from ones parents,giving up ephemeral pleasures.
I think it is worth it.Millions upon millions of men choose to embrace the will to life.Maybe one of them would choose to embrace the denial of the will to life. Will choose to go against the herd.
Will choose to chase the truth,even if he should fall by the way side,without ever attaining it.And thats okay. The point is to pursue the truth in the teeth of all societal opposition.
Deleuze keeping talking about reterritorialization. That even if one succeeds to be free,the State reterritorializes , the smooth surface is once again divided into segments. Well, I do not think Schopenhauers thoughts could be reterritorialised again. Herr Hauser would always be walking in a smooth space.
Take care.
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https://youtu.be/EKRg_gUFt6A
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Holden,
Thank you for your words and the video. I watched it and found it most interesting. A female had a crush on me as they say in American English, well a female mosquito hit me with dengue again. That´s the only female, I suppose, that´s going to hit me. Hahaha.
Life is strange. The robust Schopenhauer wrote about how abhorrent life is while the convalescent Nietzsche glorified life.
I could add that the Paraguayan mind is also obsessed with feeding and breeding given the fact that we are already almost 8 million inhabitants. The Will to life is alive and kicking. Never mind about the coronavirus and all kinds of plagues, the genitals will still be working full time. While reading this post I heard on the radio that in Ciudad del Este on the border with Brazil a grandmother, a mother and a daughter were found in a car. The grandmother was hanged, the mother was suffocated but the daughter was allowed to live. Most of us are absorbed by the blue pill, the MKultra TV, sex and reproduction.
I wish I was one of those who attended Schopenhauer´s lectures. Maybe I was there.
You may find this interesting. An archaeologist called Sam Osmanagich wrote about his experiences while visiting the abandoned Anasazi settlements in the New Mexico, Colorado, Utah, and Arizona. Long before Columbus arrived the Anasazi Indians were lords of what is now the U.S. Southwest. Then without warning they vanished around 1290.
In his talks his guide called Melvin said that, “Well, the Anasazi seers were able, by taking great risks, to see the indescribable power which was the source of all living beings. They called it the Eagle.”. “Why the Eagle?” asked Osmanagich. Melvin replied: “In the few flashes that they were able to withstand, they saw something which looked to them like a black and white eagle of an enormous size.” “They saw that the Eagle gives consciousness and knowledge. He creates beings so that they can live and enrich the consciousness and knowledge given to them.” “And then what?” Osmanagich asked. Melvin replied: “They saw that this developed consciousness leaves the being after death and moves directly to the Eagle … and is swallowed up by it.” Melvin carefully and slowly pronounces this awesome truth."
Osmanagich asked: “Do you mean to say that the only reason for our existence is to enrich the consciousness with our life's experience … and that this consciousness serves the cosmic force as food?” Melvin once again said: “The Anasazi seers saw that living beings are here to enrich the consciousness which becomes the food of the Eagle. From ancient times to the present. And forever,” Melvin concludes. “So much for the discoveries of the Anasazi seers,” said Osmanagich.
Stay safe.
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Mr.Claude,
Thank you for your words. I hope you have some tranquility wherever you are. I am part of the herd. I admit that. However for some reason I awakened to the horror called life in this prison planet called Earth.
Stay well.
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Senor Raul,
Is there anything more absurd than to wish to carry continually a burden which one can always throw down? to detest existence and yet to cling to one’s existence? in brief, to caress the serpent which devours us, till he has eaten our very heart?” -Voltaire
Take care.
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Awakened to life out of the night of unconsciousness, the will finds itself an individual in an endless and boundless world, among innumerable individuals, all striving, suffering, and erring; and, as if through a troubled dream, it hurries back to unconsciousness. Schopenhauer
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Holden,
You said that you “see no glory in dragging and feeding ones body.No glory whatsoever.Not now,not ever.”
The Will to life is alive and kicking.I have been dragging and feeding and medicating my body. I wish I could die peacefully in my sleep but I think that is not going to happen.
Take care.
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To Senor Raul,
“This world is a veil. And the face you wear is not your own.”
——True Detective:
Season 1 (2014)
Take care.
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Senor Raul,
Sometimes the price you pay for being emotionally sensitive and intelligent...
Is suicide.
Take care.
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“I never learned how to exist.”
Fernando Pessoa,
The Book of Disquiet
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“there is something disturbing going on in the basement of our cozy middle-class world” - Gordon Marino.
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Holden,
Thank you for sharing these quotes. They are very enlightening. At this moment I have no quote to share here. As I said I wish I could die in my sleep. Sometimes I feel that my bodily existence will cease to exist anytime.
But I am a slave to the dictation of this container called body that is getting sick, then it will rot and turn to ashes. We are human puppets in this slaughterhouse. Someone said to my sister that I need a girlfriend. That´s the recipe I got several times.
What is it that I will share with a lady? Miseries, financial needs and worries, anguish and pain, and to what end? Just to avoid bitterness, solitude and anxiety.
Stay safe.
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Senor Raul,
Have you seen any UFOs in the Paraguayan skies?Thanks.
If you don't mind my asking -when your parents were around , especially your mother, did they play the matchmaker for you?In India, that's very common.
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Holden,
Thank you for your response. No, my mother did not play any matchmaking but she insisted that specially my sister marry a suitable candidate. Wedding is the recipe that most give you here, there and everywhere. What most offer you are chains.
Unfortunately the Paraguayan skies are filled with polluted air. Not even a decent UFO would like to fly here.
No, I have not seen any UFOS personally. I have only seen UFOS in documentaries. The one I remember was about the Rockwell incident in 1947 and the Skin Walker Ranch in a place called Ballard, Utah. It has been linked to UFO-related activities.I also watched a movie about the Mothman prophecies based on a book by John Keel many years ago. I also watched this film Encounters of the Third Kind many years ago.
I read that in 1952 or 1954 U.S. President Dwight David Eisenhower had a meeting with extraterrestrials at Holloman Air Force Base, New Mexico. It was said that he had meetings with these creatures at least 3 times with Nordic appearing, blue eyed creatures. I think they looked like Hentrich. :D. It is said that Eisenhower wanted a treaty with them but he refused to agree to their demand that the U.S. army cease testing nuclear weapons. I also watched some documentaries about the Men In Black (MIB) who are also related to UFO activities.
In the Gnostic view, most human beings are hylics or wooden heads, bereft of any real spirit. Others are psychical or soulish ones. Only a few possess the original divine sparks or soul. Yes, I suppose I am one of the wooden heads.
Stay safe.
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Senor Raul,
Any one briefly acquainted with the history of German thought would know that Schopenhauer was par excellance. He lived alone in Frankfurt ,taking walks,,writing, taking his meals in the English cafe,attending operas in the evening.During his age I am not sure if any other philosopher of note lived in his city. In his thought he was very far away from his contemperory Hegelians who were obsessed with History and did their best to turn History itself into Philosophy.Schopenhauer would have nothing to do with it.
It is especially germane to remember that Schopenhauer knew and appreciated scientific discoveries and technologies advancements taking place all around him much more than his philosophical optimistic antagonists. He would have nothing to do with History as philosophy and would never look forward to Singularity.He stood alone against the mob of Hegelians and later,the Marxists and the socialists of every stripe.
The Marxists in their journals, when they do write about him, describe him as the very definition of a bourgeois reactionary. While like the Marxists, I and Schopenhauer,read history, too, we,unlike them, see only chaos and human misery in it and not any kind of moral progress. We see no telos.
I can imagine Schopenhauer,on a Sunday afternoon, in his house ,alone,writing in his journal against the Hegelians, against the Marxists.
Unlike Marx ,who latter,in his life looked rather fat and with paunch around his belly, Schopenhauer with his daily walks, would remain slim till his seventies. I can not see his gorging on anything except perhaps on salad.
The Marxists and the socialists with their highfalutin jargon and their endless economic analysis will never reach the truth. Not in Schopenhauers time, not now, not ever.
It is sad and a true disgrace that the very city where Schopenhauer once wrote and contemplated ,in the 1920s gave birth to the aborted fetus called the Frankfurt School.
They,like the most fashionable philosophers, would have Marx as their reigning deity. How many societies the world over are dedicated to propagate his thought-hundreds ,if not thousands and that of Schopenhauer?
These folks, the member of the Frankfurt School,would go on to write about why the working class Germans wanted everything under the Sun but their beloved communism. Why they would pay to attend Hitlers mass rallies. I have come to realise that Hitler,unbeknownst to himself, had come to personify Will to Live of the German nation.
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Holden,
Thank you for your comments. They are very enlightening. At the moment of writing my response the heat is unbearable and yesterday the Minister of Health told us that there is a confirmed case of coronavirus. What a beautiful world! So who knows?
This could be one of my last comments before the virus takes me. In Spanish we have an expression “mala hierba nunca muere” or a bad weed never die. This expression could be applied to me.
Death reminds me of Ixtab, the Mayan goddess of suicide. She was represented as a dead woman with a rope around her neck. Her duty also was to accompany the suicides to heaven. I suppose many must have taken their lives in her honor. I remember reading about those Japanese commanders who committed ritual suicide or hara-kiri. Emperor Hirohito is the one who should have killed himself after Japan surrendered in 1945.
I know very little about Karl Marx. I once read a book by British Paul Johnson many years ago about him. I read that Banker Nathan Rotschild financed Marx when he was part of a group called the League of Just Men. The originals of the cheques for him can be found in the British Museum. Others wrote that Marx was Rothschild´s cousin and that he worked as a police agent for the Prussian regime. It is said that he hated Russia for being the last stronghold of Christianity. I wonder if Lenin and Trotsky knew about this. Marx´s Jewish name, I read, is Chaim Hirschel Mordechai.
I found this quote: “The chief mission of all other races and peoples, large and small, is to perish in the revolutionary holocaust.” One of his poems goes like this:
With Satan I have struck a deal,
He chalks the signs, beats time for me
I play the death march fast and free.
Take care.
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Billie Holiday version of "Gloomy Sunday"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUCyjDOlnPU
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Senor Raul,
Sometimes the price you pay for being emotionally sensitive and intelligent...
Is suicide.
Take care.
profound ! I wish we lived in the type of world where a "couple" could read "Lust for Life" out loud together to each other, but such is not the case. No, and again, No!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3R878g-SppU
Do you think that sex lubricates? I mean, did Van Gogh have unmet primitive needs or what ?! I find it very comforting to lay next to a woman. And yet, exciting the passions can create havoc in one's life. It's just all so unreal. I am feeling tender and angry at the same time. Mad laughter and sobbing and just doing my time in this penal colony of existence like the so-called "Drunken Indian".
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjwkRhFSAcs&list=RDMM&start_radio=1&rv=3R878g-SppU
I am going through changes.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zfaOf70M4xs