Holden,
Yes, I am not alone in experiencing angry and lustful thoughts. And as you say even the so-called saints, hermits and anchorites experienced lustful thoughts.
Yes, most men and women are really vermin. I am one of them. Why should I exclude myself? As I say we are demonic beings. We are the offspring of our father, the Prince of Darkness; we are the projection of the Demiurge.
I underlined the following words by author Jacques Lacarriere:
The Gnostics, on the contrary, were the only ones to adopt a logical attitude - a radical and onerous one, but nevertheless consistent with their deepest feeling: the conviction that as thinking hominids they were totally alienated creatures, right down to their very encephalic cells, and condemned to lifelong enslavement, from which only a full awareness of man's inert and slumbering condition could save them.
The Bogomils, as far as I remember, believed the devil was the lord and creator of this world. They found support, for instance, in the Gospel according to Matthew, where the devil says to Jesus: ‘All these things I will give you, if you will fall down to worship me ’ (4: 9). The Bogomils believed that the devil offered Jesus things in the world that he, the devil, had created, and therefore the devil was master of the world.
Do I need to consult a psychiatric or a therapist for these words I am writing? Most would say I do need to see a psychiatrist. But the psychiatrist must be versed in Gnosticism really understand what is going on.
Although this has nothing to do with your comments about men and women, it reminds me of a documentary I saw about Libyan leader Colonel Muammar Gaddafi. In 1984 a Libyan who studied in the U.S. and returned to Libya was executed in front of schoolchildren in a basketball stadium.
The guy was hanged but he did not die right away. So a woman got up from her chair and grabbed the guy´s legs, pulling him down until he died. Her name was Huda Ben Amer. The executed guy was Al-Sadek Hamed Al-Shuwedy who campaigned against Gadafi´s rule. Later the Huda became the mayor of Benghazi. She was known as Huda the Executioner.
Huda was a devil in female form.
Take care.