Author Topic: A dying animal  (Read 982 times)

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Holden

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  • Hentrichian Philosophical Pessimist
Re: A dying animal
« on: September 24, 2014, 12:21:49 pm »
In  honour of Carlin's :P

Just like you I've lost tons of phones-here's what Carlin says-
(by the way,any particular reason why you use only black ink to write?)

I hate to loose anything. I don't like to loose anything cause... Where is it? See that's basically the part that bothers me the most. I'm a practical guy... Where is it? "I just had it!" You know that feeling? "It was just here!" Where is it? "I don't know." it's gone. "That's true." It's lost. "That's right". Where could it be? "Could be anywhere". Not here. "No, we know that". Maybe it'll come back. "Maybe but not yet." There are some things, I don't even care if I get them back, I just want to know where they went. And loosing things is something that's even worse when you're a child cause people get on you for it. Someone gets on your case. Not only is the item gone but you're catching heat, from up here. "You what?" I lost my yo-yo. "Well where did you have it last? "Eh! If I knew that... I'd still have my yo-yo. "Well... it must be somewhere." Right! "Well it just didn't get up and walk away". That one always got to me. 'It just didn't get up and walk away'. One time I lost the cat. It just got up and walked away. And she actually started to say it to me... Eh ma. I think you've figured this one out. Where do things go when they're lost, you know what I think? I think there's a big of things somewhere. I think there's a big pile of things that are constantly lost. You loose something Sssswwwwwwup. It goes to the pile. And then you say ohh look, there it is. Vvvvvwwwwum. Right back from the pile, and you didn't even know there was a pile. And where is the pile? In heaven, of course. It has to be in heaven, that's the first thing that happens when you get to heaven, they give you back everything you've ever lost. That's the whole meaning of heaven. "Here you go, 75 pairs of sun glasses. 212 cigarette lighters. 4983 ball point pens. And here's a jock-strap we found on interstate 90, it appears to have mule huff prints and chocolate sprinkles on it, my have been quite an evening".
« Last Edit: September 24, 2014, 01:05:41 pm by Holden »
La Tristesse Durera Toujours                                  (The Sadness Lasts Forever ...)
-van Gogh.